Snow.

I want snow. Preferably a lot of it, and now. I want big, stupid, childish hang the consequences snow. Although that probably says a lot more about me than the weather.

The thing is, everything is different in the snow. And I don’t just mean aesthetically. The rules change when there’s snow. It gives us something new to deal with, a new challenge in our everyday existences that we’re not otherwise used to. For want of a better metaphor given the temperature connotations, it spices things up a bit- and I love watching people react to that.

Snow also gives you an excuse for almost anything. You can legitimately get away with not turning up to work, school, social engagements, whatever you like because of the snow. And no one can say anything. Leaves on the line always sounds weak, delayed trains are now too believable to be believable at all. But snow, no can dispute snow.

That said, I do walk to work, so I would benefit very little from this, were I to get my wish. So I think a tiny part of me, okay quite a big part of me, just wants to see what would happen. I’ve never lived in London before- this would be my first city snow in the nearly 5 months I’ve lived here. It seems unimaginable to me that a busy, unsleeping, be-suited city such as London could be felled by a mere snowflake or too. But it happens. It has happened- I’ve seen it on the news, time and time again.

 And now I really, really want to see it for myself. When news stations around the country show footage of ‘how the snow is affecting the capital’, I want to know that I’m there, I’m in it, I’m living it with everyone else.

Just for a day or two though, you understand. I don’t fancy having wet shoes for weeks on end. Although perhaps then I could just buy some wellies and invest in a warmer coat? See? This is what I love about snow. Regardless of snowmen, snowball fights and tearing about open spaces leaving snowy footprints everywhere, for a few days a year, you have to re-evaluate the tiny details of how you live your life. And, just for a few days, that can be really, really fun.

Why I love horror films.

Earlier today I bought and watched The Exorcism of Emily Rose, the 2005 film based on the real-life negligent homicide case against a Catholic priest. Not a particularly remarkable fact, I grant you. But my watching of …Emily Rose becomes perhaps slightly more interesting when I tell you that this is my second exorcism film in as many weeks, and my third in as many months. It’s been right up there with my better home cinema experiences of late, along with Insidious, Paranormal Activity 2, Let the Right One In, and Thirty Days of Night.

Having reviewed my recent DVD purchases, I have decided that it’s time to face facts. A fact, really. And not one I would have foreseen myself facing up to. You see, the thing is… I love horror films. In fact I really love horror films. I can take or leave chick flicks, action movies or even epics- I have to be in the right mood or frame of mind for those. But rare is the occasion when I’m not in the mood for a good old fashioned horror.

I’ve wondered at length as to why this is. I’m not a particularly big fan of being scared for the sake of being scared- my hatred of fairground rides and rollercoasters is notorious amongst those who know me well. So why do I actively seek out and spend good money on films designed to send shivers down my spine? The conclusion I’ve come to is that it is not because they do send shivers down my spine, but because they can.

You see, horror films are really quite clever- they have to be. Even the most low-budget badly made horrors need to be incredibly carefully considered. They’re trying to draw a reaction from you, after all. They have to tap into what scares us, and, with the better films of the genre, why. 

As with my other great genre love, comedy, horror films fascinate me because they exist purely to shock as big a reaction as possible out of their audience. The more they make your brain behave differently, the more the panic sets in, the shortness of breath, the more you hide your face in your boyfriend’s jumper or draw your girlfriend to you, the more scared you find yourself feeling if you nip to the loo before the end of the film- the more stars there are on the reviews.

True, some of them are cheesy, and don’t scare us at all. But it’s the fact that they have to try that really is fascinating. They cannot rely on the parts of human nature other films do, like empathy, or on more structural things like dialogue and plot. They have to tap in to real caveman psychology like the fight or flight response, as well as more modern fears like our suspicion of technology. The simple fact is that, in order to work, they have to know what you’re thinking before you do.

Scary in itself? Maybe. But of course that just makes me, and the millions of other horror fans out there, love them all the more.

New Year's Resolutions.

Being quite an obsessive sort of person, every year I meticulously think up my New Year’s Resolutions and set them carefully to paper. However, being on the other hand a very active member of club scatterbrain, nine times out of ten I lose said piece of paper, become hopelessly confused as to whether there was a piece of paper at all and what it looked like, and/or forget about the existence of New Year’s Resolutions altogether. So, in an attempt to actually keep them this year, or at least remember that I made them in the first place, I have decided to post them on here. It’s possibly the longest blog post I’ve written so far, so do battle on if you feel so inclined. Comments/advice appreciated.

1.       Embrace the anti-climax. I think about this particular one every Christmas/birthday/anniversary/major event of note. I am so convinced that occasions of this sort must be completely earth-shatteringly wonderful from start to finish that I know even before my alarm clock goes off that the day is doomed to be an utter disaster. I then simply watch and wait as it becomes exactly that. Well no more! This Christmas Day managed to be my best for many years- well, since the days when I still believed in the man in the red suit, at least. I strongly believe that this is the result of my very conscious decision (admittedly at around 1am on Christmas morning whilst I was lying awake fretting about anti-climaxes) that this year I would not let Christmas fail me! This year I would expect absolutely nothing, not a single present, sprout or glass of bubbly, and would spend the entire day doing nothing but going with the flow, appreciating everything, and counting my blessings- however small. And to no one’s surprise more than my own- it worked. Thus, this year I have decided to file all of these little pointers to myself under the header of anti-climax appreciation, and endeavour to actually enjoy holidays/festivals and the like from now on. Instead of frittering them away worrying that I’m just not having as much fun as I should be.

2.       Have fewer pre-conceptions, and in so doing become a better shopper. I like to think of myself as a pretty tolerant, accepting and non-judgemental person. And when it comes to people, I am. As soon as you throw a high street shop in my direction, however, I am liable to turn my nose up and refuse to go in for as miniscule a reason as I don’t like their choice of lighting fixtures (New Look), or because I spot someone the same age as my mother walking in beside me. This is the problem I have with Next. I frequently throw a small scale hissy fit if I’m  forced to shop there, on the grounds that it would be theoretically possible to see women of ages ranging from 15 up to death wearing the same top as me, such is the wide range of clientele they cater to. It would be useful to point out at this stage that I am a terrible shopper. Really terrible. Money burns a hole in my pocket, I panic buy, buy stuff I feel I should buy but don’t actually like, hoard truly horrendous pieces out of guilt, buy things I don’t really need just because they’re a bit unusual- the list really is endless. I’m hoping that by having fewer pre-conceptions about not only shops but even the clothes themselves, I will become a better shopper. I might even save myself some money.

3.       Be more spontaneous. After much consideration, I’m still a bit unsure about this one. Attempting spontaneity is notoriously tricky as the moment you become aware you’re being spontaneous, or are trying to be, by definition you no longer are. However as ‘go with the flow’ has already partly been included in my first resolution, I’m already covering my bases and thus in with half a shout of actually achieving this.

4.       Learn more. Having only left university about 6 months ago, I have already begun to feel my mind slowing down a bit, questioning the world around me less and beginning to favour common sense over philosophical, whimsical musings. This must end! By reading more non-fiction articles about issues I haven’t previously known anything about, going to see more unusual films/exhibitions, watching more documentaries, as well as turning somewhat reluctantly back to the type of books I read as part of my degree, I’m hoping that this year I really can learn more. I’ve already read some reports on social media for work, and my Dad has leant me ‘The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People’, so I feel like I’m already half way there with this one.

And finally, the one I hold out the least amount of hope for-

5.       Overthink less. This is the big one, really. The one I need to achieve most, and the one I’m least likely to. It is one of my most irritating and worrisome traits, both to myself and to others, that I over think pretty much everything. On occasion I can be really quite impulsive, with some slightly misinformed souls even commenting upon this. What they don’t see, however, is me sitting awake for half the night after the event worrying about the whys and wherefores of what I did/should have done. If nothing else than for the increase in free time I’d see if I could only stop worrying, this needs to be done.

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